I had to put my oldest cat, Sophie, to sleep today. She turned 17 this summer, but the past year she's had a tumor that just kept getting bigger, and bigger, and we recently noticed they were starting to form in her abdomen. My mom got up this morning and she had diarrhea, and she decided to bring her to the vet and let Anne (vet and friend of the family) decide for us what SHE would do.

We decided we'd do it now. Anne put it best; "It's not month by month anymore, it's not even week by week. It's day by day at this point and I think it would be best for her."

I promised myself I'd hold it together for my mom, but as soon as she started to sob I just broke down in to (Oh god I'm doing it again XD) tears and sobs. I think at that point the people in the waiting room had figured out what we had decided because my breaths were so uncontrollably sharp.

It was so peaceful, and she fought until the end. Haha, growling and snarling when they touched her hind feet as per usual... It took a good 7 minutes for the sedative to take effect, but you could tell immediately when it did. She just was slumped in my mom's arms, and her third eyelid was appearing (Which was black, and I didn't know that. I just assumed all cat's third eyelids were a fleshy pink... I never noticed it before, but I don't think I've ever seen her third eyelid before. Which means she's always been a trooper through sickness) Anyways, at that point, they brought out the razor, shaved a bit on her leg, and oh my did she growl. Comic relief really. And it was then that Anne said "They're usually gone before I finish the injection". We nodded and petted her, talked softly, etc. And just like that, I felt the life leave her around halfway through the needle.

It was strange. Her eyes were still open, but they looked so peaceful. She didn't have a grimace on her face as she did when they were so artfully removing a patch of fur. She had that 'eternal smile' you always hear about cats having.She had a relaxed happiness that I only ever saw on her when she was curled up on my mother's lap, purring, wrapped in a blanket with my mom petting her.

As we left the room (They let us go out the back) I glanged back at her and it was the strangest thing. She LOOKED lifeless at that point. Just laying there, not reacting to my presence, nothing. Usually when I walk into a room with her, she becomes angry and uncomfortable, and the fact that she was just there... Doing nothing about me, it was unsettling, and I quickly left, upping my pace to catch up to my mother.
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So we get home, and we notice Georgie, now the oldest, is acting odd. We think at first she's noticed the overwhelming lack of bitchcat. Then we see she's headed to the litterbox. Normally she'd just go outside. So we scoot her from there, and she walks into the downstairs bathroom, into the shower stall, and pisses in the shower. Only she doesn't piss, she dribbles, and it's not piss, it fucking blood.

Her bladder crystals are back. It's because we ran out of our normal preventative care food, and had to wait two weeks while it got ordered in, and the food from my old pet store that we gave her managed to give them back to her in less than two weeks. Luckily we picked up their normal food today whilst I was sobbing. Anyways, she'll survive, but fuck... (haha, buttfuck....)


All in all it's been a really weird day.
I'll miss you Sophie. <3333
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These next two are my favorite Georgie and Sophie.
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